Dark Butterfly (176 pages) is Rexina Vega’s second novel. It is the story of a woman suffering from schizophrenia, and the powerlessness of psychiatry to save her.

The novel is divided into eight parts. In part 1, ‘In hac lacrimarum valle’, the woman leaves a message on someone’s answering machine. She is afraid she is going to lose control of herself and does not wish to leave before giving that someone a kiss. We read about her various attempts at suicide: she tried to cut her veins in the bathtub, but her wrist pulled away; she tried to drown herself at the beach, but her body insisted on rising to the surface; she tried swallowing a bunch of pills from her grandparents’ box of medicines, but threw them up; she tried taking a box of Valium 10 mg and wanted to ring her sister to say goodbye, but got the answering machine.

In part 2, ‘Shadows and Tall Trees’, a song by Irish band U2, we read the woman’s diary entries from 2 February – her first visit to the psychiatrist – to 3 June – her release from hospital. Her family takes her to see a psychiatrist, who asks the woman brief, invasive questions, but doesn’t seem to hear her long and intricate answers. He prescribes Haloperidol 10 mg. Back at home, the woman refuses to take the drops her mother gives her and throws the glass of water across the room. We jump to the end of April: she feels an incredible, unfamiliar energy climbing up her spine to the back of her neck. At the beginning of May, she feels it is necessary to avoid plugs and switch off all the electrical appliances at home in case these intensely blue, evil beings take advantage of a small cleft to enter her body. Voices in her head try to make her grab anything that can wound, anything that shines. She tries to resist the voices.

By 6 May, the woman has been admitted to hospital. She is convinced there are many bad people in the world, she must remain alert. She continues listening to the song by U2. The hospital reminds her of a ship with portholes, windows that cannot be opened. A fairy with a siren’s tail comes and asks for her help. She has to share her room with an old woman, who punches her in the face during the night and is later moved. She then shares with a much younger woman, María, who is quiet and polite. They discuss songs and exchange tapes. María has a twin brother, her strict reverse, who studies Medicine, whereas she was always getting into trouble at school. She draws nymph women, poisonous snakes, hard, postmodern housewives, and imagines clothes for them. The woman resents the harsh treatment they receive, being filled with substances, as if all their carers want is for them to fall asleep. The only thing that helps against all the sedatives is to smoke cigarettes, but these are rationed. Life is waiting for the next cigarette. In the smoking room, a male patient tells the woman not to look at him and is about to assault her when he is removed by the carers. The woman is isolated, her personal possessions are taken away from her. She wishes that she could see her family, that they could understand the sacrifice she is making so that their lives will be lighter.

The woman sleeps for twelve days; sleep is merciful, it’s waking up that is painful. She feels she is going to be crushed by the metal door of the room. A psychotherapist informs them of a new invention: tiny robots that will invade their bloodstream and detect any anomalies, informing the local hospital or applying the necessary treatment. All the patients are gathered together in a room. The woman feels María’s resentment behind her. She has been given a pack of felt-tip pens and draws butterfly sirens on white sheets of paper. The psychiatrist informs her that she is improving and they will be able to reduce the amount of medication she is taking. The woman comes up with a list of collaborative strategies: adopting a broad smile; going for regular walks; approaching the less dangerous patients and avoiding the more dangerous ones; not stealing cigarette butts from the smoking room; attending meals and eating everything; asking for cigarettes only once every ninety minutes; taking part enthusiastically in all the workshops.

The woman goes to the large room where patients are knitting scarves that are too long, sweaters that have no openings, and others are cutting wood with a saw that keeps on breaking. She joins the painting group and draws her very own siren, who knows she is being poisoned, an image of the woman’s suffering. The monitor is impressed and talks about entering the drawing in a competition, but the woman thinks she is just being nice in order to trick her and overcome her resistance. María and the woman shout at the monitor and are forcibly removed from the room. María suggests they have to use their drawings and get far away from the hospital and the city. They decide to attend the meetings with the psychotherapist again in an attempt to convince the hospital to let them go. The psychotherapist presents a news item about a father who left bottles of alcohol lying around and his two-year-old daughter, who was admitted to hospital after drinking the alcohol left in the bottles. The father was acquitted, and this makes María very angry. She thinks someone should steal into his house at night and kill him. This makes the other patients join in. They blame their parents for the state they are in. The woman moves away, comes across another patient, Elías, a heroin addict, in the courtyard and feels renewed sexual desire despite the medication they are taking. They make love, and some of the other patients see them.

It is visiting day. María and the woman have not had a family visit for three weeks and are eager to go outside. The woman’s mother and sister take her to a café, where the woman smokes cigarettes and watches the world from her safe haven. She buys an amulet – a Turkish eye – to protect her when she is in hospital. She feels tired and wants to return sooner, but sees María kissing her brother and is confused. Only once they are back in their room does the woman understand: when their father was beating their mother, the two children would seek comfort from each other under the sheets. The woman’s medication is reduced. She goes to see the psychiatrist in the hope that things might get better, but when the psychiatrist asks if she still hears voices, although the one that caused her to be violent has gone, she has to admit to the other: her connection with Bono, the lead singer of U2. The doctor is unimpressed and suggests she remove the Turkish eye, which shines too much. On 3 June, María, Elías and the woman are due to be released. Elías is not happy: he knows he will take drugs again, there will be no one to make sure he takes the medication that stops him seeing things. They are released. They know the life they are returning to lacks security and routine. María’s and the woman’s mothers are waiting for them, nervous at the thought of taking responsibility for them again.

In part 3, ‘Sun Shine on Me’, lyrics from the U2 song ‘The Three Sunrises’, the woman returns home, shuts herself in her room and sleeps until the early hours of the morning. She then tries to decide what to do with her future: whether to continue with her university studies, to take an English course at the Escuela Oficial de Idiomas or to do something more practical – a painting or pottery course – but in the end she scrunches up the sheet with all her ideas and throws it out of the window. María and the woman meet up. María explains she is going to study design in Barcelona. She then asks what the woman is going to do. The woman looks up and sees an advert on the wall of the bar for a photography course. She feels this is what she needs. At home, she goes through the telephone numbers in her diary. The people she likes speaking to best are the mothers, who always have time for her and are prepared to hear about her suffering, solitude and fears. She arranges to meet Elías. They go to a bar, but Elías starts laying into someone. He continues to hear voices. They escape from there and go to the beach, but the sea, instead of being calm (and calming them), is rough. Elías tries to kiss her, but the woman rejects him. Elías takes off his clothes and wades into the water. The woman returns to the seafront, where she makes friends with some African immigrants. One of them gives her a scarab ring to help her start a new life. The holidays are coming, which means her family and friends are going to have more time for her.

During July and August, the woman feels better. She makes clay doves and hearts, which she gives to all her visitors together with a rose, telling them she loves them. María comes to visit and brings her the new album by U2. In September, the woman visits a psychiatrist in the local health centre, she doesn’t have to go to hospital anymore and her medication is reduced again. She goes to see off María, who is travelling to Barcelona and promises to invite her to her first fashion show. In October, the woman starts a language course at the Escuela Oficial de Idiomas and feels happy to be considered normal, even admired because of her proficiency. She also starts a drawing course. Her new teacher is not particularly impressed by her drawings of sirens and gives her some still life to draw instead. The woman finds it difficult, but accepts she is not going to get it right at the first attempt. People around her think she should be planning for a profession, but these courses are all she can manage at the moment. Finally, she starts a photography course, which she hopes will enable her to capture objects without the filter of her medication, as they really are. She is impressed by her new teacher, Sira, who has just arrived from Paris and treats the students with a haughty air. She sets them the task of taking a series of photographs of meaningful objects. In November, the woman continues with her three courses and manages to sleep.

In part 4, ‘Dark Butterfly’, the woman receives letters from María in Barcelona. María is well. She has started her classes. She finds the city full of energy, information, novelty. She feels very small, sometimes very big. In October, she has had lots of contact with foreigners and slept with lots of them. She has problems with her flatmate, who doesn’t clean up after himself in the kitchen and there are cockroaches. She is working hard on a design based on the woman’s drawing of a butterfly’s wings. At the beginning of November, María believes that her flatmate has come into her room at night and set fire to her designs because he is jealous; the police blame a cigarette in the ashtray that hadn’t been put out properly. María feels she has to move, otherwise she will stab her flatmate with a knife. Later that month, she is afraid of the city, everyone is in a hurry, you can do whatever you like – bare your tits, walk with your arms in the air – and no one will pay you any attention. By the end of November, María suspects there is a conspiracy against her on the part of her flatmate and fellow students. Even the teachers on her course seem bored with her. She thinks it is because they cannot stand the fact she is talented. She would like to shut down all schools for forcing you to curtail your aspirations.

In December, María is having trouble doing her job in a bar properly. She keeps getting the drinks wrong. She thinks the bottles are changing places deliberately in order to confuse her. Later that month, María has moved to a cheap apartment in the red-light district, she has only been out twice all week and has stopped washing herself in order to be essential. In the end, she has to go back to her classes so that her parents continue to send her money. She doesn’t want to have to return home. A week later, María is expelled from the design school. She again suspects a conspiracy on the part of her former flatmate and asks the woman to come. The rest of this section is in the form of a diary entry. It is 29 December, and the woman has just arrived in Barcelona. She finds the city overwhelming and only with great difficulty does she reach María’s apartment, where on the buzzer María has drawn a dark butterfly next to her name. Once there, the two of them make love with extreme urgency. María then explains that she needs the woman’s help to appeal against the school’s decision to expel her. The woman notices that María hasn’t been taking her medication. She thinks she’s talking nonsense, and María realizes this. She lays into the woman, leaving her unconscious. When the woman comes to, her head is cut and her face is bruised. She takes some sleeping pills and wakes to find that María has committed suicide by throwing herself down the light well of the building.

In part 5, ‘A Kite Imprisoned’, the woman has abandoned her studies. All she has left is Bono, the lead singer of U2. The woman visits a doctor in hospital who laughs at her and takes pleasure in wielding power over her. The woman doesn’t recognize herself in the mirror. Despite abandoning her courses, she takes a series of photographs and, in the spring, goes to visit her photography teacher, Sira, to show them to her. Sira is surprised at her appearance, the way she is wearing two jumpers and lots of amulets, which the woman says protect her, but she is impressed by the woman’s photographs and finds them very valuable. The woman is grateful. In June, the woman attends Elías’s funeral. He has drowned himself on the selfsame beach where they went for a walk a year earlier. There, she meets up with the African who gave her a scarab ring. He is distressed to see the state she is in and claims he cannot help her. She is full of echoes, shadows, reflections; there are warm forms of madness, but hers is a cold form of madness.

In part 6, ‘Ember That Goes Out’, the woman has been taken to Emergency on several occasions, either by the police or by her family, suffering from delirium, sadness, a death wish. The woman is told she must have her teeth removed, the roots are rotten. She feels abused by her medication. She is again admitted to hospital.

In part 7, ‘Hostage’, the woman is horrified by how many pills she has taken, how many cigarettes she has smoked. She has put on a lot of weight. She is even beginning to forget what Bono looks like and wonders what sense there is to her life. She would like to be like Jesus, hanging on the Cross by her butterfly’s wings, pure and humble at heart, full of love for men and women, because she has come from dark places and suffering has opened her eyes, nourished her perception.

In part 8, ‘Christmas Eve’, the woman wonders whether anyone will miss her. She wants to get better, to be released from hospital, but is finding it difficult to form words, to think. Her hand no longer has any strength. The poison has got the better of her. There is then an annexe, certifying the woman’s death at the age of 35.

Dark Butterfly is a strong and expertly written narrative about the advance of madness and the inability of other people to help the person in question. There are moments when the sufferer’s mind seems to reach the surface and have moments of clarity, but soon the voices, the paranoia, take control again. They seek affirmation, but more often than not experience only fear of their surroundings and fear of rejection. The medication, while it may help, is viewed as an enemy, something that poisons their body. María refuses to take her medication altogether. They find support in each other, but ultimately that support gives out, and the patient is left in free fall, unable to exert control over their faculties. In the end, the families and hospital staff become anonymous, even grotesque, separated by a barrier they are unable to overcome; even simple gestures are misunderstood and taken as threatening. This is a memorable narrative from an author working at the height of her powers about the effects of schizophrenia on the human psyche.

Synopsis © Jonathan Dunne